“Everyone needs a coach. It doesn’t matter whether you’re a basketball player, a tennis player, a gymnast, or a bridge player . . .  We all need people who will give us feedback. That’s how we improve.”

• Bill Gates, founder and former CEO of Microsoft and co-director of the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, speaking on a TED Talk, 2016

“Every famous athlete, every famous performer, has somebody who’s a coach, someone who can watch what they’re doing and say, `is that what you really meant?’ and give them perspective. The one thing which people are really never good at is seeing themselves as others see them. The coach really, really helps.”

• Eric Schmidt, CEO of Google, speaking on a TED talk, 2016

If Bill Gates and Eric Schmidt need coaches, you and I need them too.

Bill and Eric are two of the most brilliant executives of the last 50 years, but they are wise enough to understand that although they are smart, a “lone wolf” mentality cannot ultimately lead to success. They each understand that they need coaches who can see things that they cannot see about themselves, no matter how smart they are.

A professional coach provides the honest, high-level direction that no other person can – not your best friend, not your spouse or partner, not your kids, not the smart executive you just hired – no one. A coach is someone who is there for you, no one else, and someone you can completely trust.

A coach can do that because a coaching relationship is specific, unique and confidential. It is not about your coach’s concerns and needs. It is about improving your success and effectiveness.

Why a Coaching Relationship Is Productive

As a successful executive, you have surrounded yourself with a capable team. But no matter how great they are, they are not there to improve and help you. Their priorities are the success of your organization and their own personal success.

A professional coach is there for you, not for your company. Although the counsel that you get will ultimately benefit your organization, your coach is not focused on that. He or she is there to make you as good as you can possibly be.

The Structure of an Effective Coaching Relationship

4. Formalize the coaching relationship. You don’t wander into a coaching relationship by, say, taking a potential coach to lunch and beginning to ask questions. Why? Because if you don’t formalize the coaching role and set specific expectations, you will not build a foundation for your growth. Can’t you take a potential coach to lunch? Of course you can. But there will come a point when you must say, “I want to hire you to become my coach . . . I would like you to be my success coach . . . will you agree to take me on?”
5. Consider hiring a professional coach. You could, of course, ask someone you highly respect to step into the role of being your coach. But it is usually better to hire and compensate a professional coach. Why? Because when you do, you set up both a structure and clear expectations that your coach will motivate and guide you to achieve better performance. If you were going to your gym to hire a personal trainer, you expect to pay him or her. And that structure provides benefits, because he or she will be somewhat firmer in setting benchmarks for you to hit, and in expecting you to perform.
6. Set up a structure. Our coaching experience has shown that it is best to schedule a time to speak on the phone (or meet in person if possible or have a video call) every two weeks. How long should those calls or meetings be? We would suggest blocking out about one hour at first, and to adjust from there. In most cases, you will not need that much time, but scheduling a little extra time depressurizes the start of the relationship. And another thing. At all costs, avoid cancelling the times you have scheduled with your coach. If it is on your calendar for, say, every Friday at noon, then consider that time sacrosanct. If you let your coaching sessions get cancelled and buffeted around by everything else on your schedule, your coaching relationship will lose its special character and become just one more scheduling item.
7. Decide on some categories of issues to discuss. But do not set those issues in stone. The best coaching relationships are fluid and flexible. Over time, new issues and challenges will arise that you will want to discuss with your coach. And another remarkable thing will happen too, when your coach notices things about you that he or she would like to coach you on. That is why the best coaching relationship are both structured and unstructured. Let’s take a closer look . . .

Issues to Be Coached On

When your coaching relationship begins, it might look and feel like a personal friendship, because your coach will be getting to know you. Most effective coaches will ask questions about you – your professional background, your company and the challenges it is facing, challenges you have tackled in the past, and even about your family and personal history. But in a coaching relationship, those questions are not asked to establish a friendship, but to give your coach perspective he or she needs to do a better job of understanding and counseling you.

In a stimulating and productive way, your relationship with your coach will probably unfold in the following way.

You will ask questions like these . . .

• “I have been uncomfortable being a negotiator in the past and now I am about to negotiate a major acquisition . . . how can I mentally prepare?”
• “I’m having a hard time getting members of my top team to focus on the priorities I have set . . . how can I reel them in?”
• “I have never led a company through a period of rapid expansion like the one we are in . . . I need some perspective and maybe even some confidence.”
• “I sometimes think of myself as someone with a modest education who came from a little town and now I am playing in the big leagues . . . how can I adjust?”
• “My professional style and attitude might need some rethinking and adjusting . . . I tend to be too assertive and demanding [or possibly too accommodating] and I need help adjusting that.”

Your professional coach, who should have a strong background in business, will listen and guide you make the best decisions about business issues like these . . .

• Freeing more of your time to focus on top priorities.

• Trusting and delegating more autonomy to others.

• Improving your approach to staffing and building a top executive team.

• Getting started with succession planning.

• Building your personal brand.

• Encouraging excellence, execution and other business virtues in your organization.

To Learn More about Tortal Coaching Services . . . 

Call 704-323-8953